Christmas in Love

Christmas has come and gone - and I find that it is time to reflect. Christmas was interesting this year. It was my first Christmas away from home... and in many ways - my first real Christmas as a Family. Jaren and I celebrated by sharing Christmas Eve with our friends the Echeverria's.

It was so much fun. I absolutely adore their children, and to listen to them talk about the birth of Jesus Christ... well it finally helped me to feel the Christmas Spirit. I never knew how much that feeling (for me) was connected to the love I have for my family back home. To say that I was homesick is an understatement.

Then there was that sweet contentment that I found in making our own Christmas. I laughed as my sister Siobhan called to make sure that we would go buy hot chocolate (which we did) so that I could have a cup of hot cocoa before we opened presents. I giggled when I realized that Jaren finally understood that, for me, the stocking is the most fun part of opening presents! And I cried when some of my family from back home called to make sure I knew that I was missed.

To share it with Alta... well, as you can see, that was the best part!

The year of 2009 truly has been the "best of times and ... the worst of times." I am so grateful for my family this year. More so than ever. I have never understood them more than by being so far away. That, and becoming a mother, may have something to do with it. Do you guys find yourselves thinking, "Dang, my mother was / is amazing?" all the time? I do.

So does Alta! See, that's what she's thinking right here!

Anyhow, I also figured out around 6 weeks postpartum that I was dealing with some postpartum depression. This discovery was made after I found myself balling for nothing... again... or maybe for like the 12th time one day. I will say it didn't really feel like "for nothing" at the time. When I finally vocalized that I thought I had "it" to some friends - and to Jaren it was like I was finally able to tackle the issue. Luckily it coincided with the time that I could start running again. I have always fought off depression (and all other general bad moods) with working out. I figured I could try that again, and if it didn't work, go talk to the doctor. I am happy to report that my body really does balance itself when I give it the proper endorphins. Another thing I should be truly grateful for.

See, Alta's grateful for it!

Now, may I take this time to reiterate the fact that I LOVE RUNNING. I love it. I love how sore I get. I love how I can't breathe when I start out. I love how when I stick to it, suddenly it becomes this magical place where I'm not far from home, where I don't feel alone, or tired, or overwhelmed. I am perfectly in the moment, and rejoicing in my body, and it's great gift of being able to work again. Alta seems to enjoy it as well. This is her running with mommy hat. It keeps her nice and warm while I push her and Mommy into happiness.

I am also grateful, once again, for my husband. Jaren is truly the most patient man ever born. I am so happy that he is finished with his first portion of flight school, and that he FINALLY got to take his paternity leave. It is amazing how much easier life has been with him around. Alta really loves and is bonded with her daddy, and I find that to be one of the greatest gifts of having a family. Daddy loves his Alta, and does an amazing Earny (from Sesame Street) impersonation. I love watching them cuddle, and smile at each other.

I will also say that I find it interesting which skills each parent has naturally. I love that I can tell how to soothe Alta. She doesn't cry. Really. She does this little yell thing for food. A whiny thing for a diaper change or gas. She has only really cried 3 times... and each of those times freaked me out. Once at the doctor -shots... well no duh. Once while on Jaren's chest sleeping, out of nowhere - not sure why still... calmed right down though after we woke her up. And once in her crib out of nowhere. Again, calmed right down after we woke her up.

Most of the time she is just very calm. I'm really lucky, and I know this.

She started cooing and smiling (real smiles - not gassy ones) right at the same time. Same day to be exact, December 18th. It makes my heart sing. How bout you, does this cutie make your heart sing? I thought so!

I can't wait for her 2 month Doctor's appointment (not for the shots of course) - but for the weighing and measuring. We have done a little of that on our own, and so far she has grown 2 inches, and over 4 pounds. Don't you just love a chubby baby neck?

I do!